Friday, April 14, 2006
Thank You
A quick entry to give a short, sweet shout out to the mysterious anonymous donor to my Revlon 5k Run/Walk page. Your pledge is greatly appreciate, Mr/Miss Anonymous, even more greatly appreciated is you pledged in memory of Dana Fairbanks. You just made my weekend.

posted by runnerbird | 11:47 PM

Wednesday, April 12, 2006
12 of 12: The New York Walking Tour Edition
It started off innocent enough, just a few pictures chronicling my day, but then somewhere between 2pm and 3pm, it morphed into a walking tour of New York. I don't know what the hell happened. Oh wait, I do. I did not want to bore another living soul with ten pictures of my frame parked in front of a computer screen. It is bad enough that it is what I do all day. No need to subject the general public to it. If you are unfamiliar with this exercise, it was started by the lovably snarky Chad Darnell. Here is my day, in (god help us all) twelve images.

[1] 7:21 a.m.: Breakfast never looked so basic
[2] 7:48 a.m.: Knock, knock, it's the Queens County Marshall
[3] 7:52 a.m.: You can't beat this ride
[4] 8:26 a.m.: Stand clear of the closing doors
[5] 8:31 a.m.: Cube, sweet, cube
[6] 1:04 p.m.: Ray of Light
[7] 1:18 p.m.: Mmmm ... tasty
[8] 2:31 p.m.: Cubes everywhere
[9] 3:07 p.m.: LaGuardia
[10] 3:13 p.m.: The Square
[11] 5:51 p.m.: Back home
[12] 7:47 p.m.: Fresh Gossip

The bonus picture this month is "Red". In honor the warm temperature and the start of Spring in the Big Apple, here is our version of the great outdoors.

posted by runnerbird | 11:05 PM

Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Doctor, Doctor
First and foremost, I'd like to give a big hug and lots of love to Subha Comandur, who contributed to my 5k Walk/Run. It was a welcome surprise and a very groovy way to start a Tuesday morning and I don't use the word "groovy" to describe anything except Madonna, so you know the word is special. Thank you, so very much, from the bottom of my pop culture lovin' heart. I would buy you a fruity, alcoholic beverage or perhaps some tea if we ever cross paths in that other reality off the web.

The number of times I've heard the phrase "bone marrow biopsy" in the past month is a little ridiculous, but that is price we have to pay when you watch not one (yay, Grey's Anatomy), not two (yay, Scrubs), but three television shows (yay, Hospital Central) set in hospitals. We won't mention that a few of those times were in Spanish (luckily, Hospital Central is preempted this week for soccer...and the fact that I know this means I've moved from casual fan to just plan crazy). On a whim last week, I bought the first two seasons of Scrubs and I think its moved past Arrested Development on my fangirl list of comedies I adore. Believe me, there is a list. It is tacked onto my fridge door right beneath my niece's first picture and a coupon for Tide. While Arrested Development has some of the funniest minutes to ever grace network broadcast television, I probably would never use an adjective like "moving" or "warm" to describe it. Scrubs has those ludicrous fantasy asides and a heart the size of music collection (20+ Gigs of love). I was completely blind-sided over the weekend, when during the second season finale, my eyes grew misty when cantankerously lovable Dr. Cox punched the hospital's evil chief administrator Dr. Kelso square in the kisser for mercilessly chewing out poor, sweet but somewhat bumbling Dr. Elliot Reid. It was beautiful to see how much Dr. Cox cared, how much he sees his interns as ... family.

But let me get back to my analogy (wait it is an analogy.. a simile...damn, I knew I should have payed attention in English class). No, wait. It's a simile. The size of love in my heart for Scrubs = music disk space on my computer. Probably, one of the reasons I love this show so much is it's use of music. Give the music supervisor on the damn show a raise. To prove my point, here are five songs I now love because they were featured in key moments on the show:

:: Nil Lara - Fighting for My Love (Season 1: The first time J.D. and Elliot hook-up)
:: Buzzcocks - Ever Fallen in Love (Season 1: J.D. and Elliot hook-up all over the hospital)
:: The Coral - Dreaming of You (Season 2: The second time J.D. and Elliot hook-up)
:: Del Amitri - Tell Her This (Season 2: J.D. and Elliot break-up ... again)
:: Colin Hay - Overkill (Season 2: Opening moments of season premiere)

I might have this little tiny thing (big, freaking amounts of affection) for the prospect of J.D. and Elliot ending up together. They are so neurotic, dorkish and helpless they just have to end up together to raise wonderfully, beautifully unstable children.

I forgot to do this last week, so here are my pop culture/life realizations, just a tad bit late:

- Are you a grup? I know I am and not ashamed of it. I'll be rockin' my faded jeans as business casual attire until I'm at least sixty-four.

- It is the most wonderful time of the year and I'm not talking Spring (although the warm weather is lovely). It is Tribeca Film Festival time again and not a moment too soon. I've already got my tickets (thanks to a friend) for Al Franken: God Spoke and shall try to fight my way into East Broadway (Margaret Cho, Gale Harold and Stephanie March, was this film made just for me?). Nothing, however, can top the possibility of attending this panel discussion. Mia ... Maestro! Even her name is pretty.

- Speaking of Stephanie March (because I don't think anyone else will use that phrase ever), has anyone watched Conviction? The Cabot enthusiast in me forced the rational side of me to watch three episodes of it before the rational side of me beat the enthusiast side of me with a blunt, heavy object. I assure you, being beaten is probably more fun than watching Convinction. Tired. Boring. Procedural in that cookie-cutter way that makes me want to weep, this show couldn't find original if handed the "O" section of the dictionary. I officially checked out of the show when it used Coldplay's "Warning Sign" from the 2002 album "A Rush of Blood to the Head" and remarked, "my god, even this show's music is outdated."

- I could say that I knew that SNL's/TV Funhouse's The Ambiguously Gay Duo were voiced by Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell, but ... uhm... I so didn't. If you enjoy these segments as much as I do, but sure to watch this. I mean, what else do you have to do on a Saturday night?

posted by runnerbird | 4:13 PM

Monday, April 10, 2006
Madonna Math
Calculus did not prepare me for the following math dilemma:

If there are seats available for Madonna's final concert at Madison Square Garden at a 65 degree angle from the stage, 900 feet away, but still close enough to see the muscle definition of Madonna's famously yoga-ed arms, how poor will you be after you buy said tickets?

Using the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus:

And a simple loan equation:

I was able to come up with the correct answer: Very poor, but worth every penny. Yes, with the money I paid for my single ticket I could probably support a family of four in a third world nation for a month. I feel a little guilty. The guilt will be replaced by shouts of "time goes by so slowly" on July 3rd when I party with an arena full of Madonna fans shaking our collective assets to every groovy song. I expect amazing things, Madonna. I expect some old-school songs I haven't heard since 1985. I expect an encore and perhaps, a Swedish massage afterwards (for these ticket prices, I should demand a meal at a four-star restaurant and some cocktails). I will settle for "Everybody" and five dollars off your over-priced tour merchandise.

Madonna, please do not forsake me and deliver a show that will rank as one of the best experiences of my life. No pressure.

:: Madonna vs Gorillaz - Grammy Mashup Performance
:: Madonna - Get Together
:: Madonna - Burning Up (Rock Version)
:: Madonna - Everybody
:: Madonna - I Love New York
:: Madonna - Let It Will Be

posted by runnerbird | 4:12 PM

Sunday, April 09, 2006
Magic Music 8-Ball
I stole this from Kung Fu Kitten who stole it from someone else. I have 4160 songs on iTunes. I thought this would be a fun exercise in crazy.

"What do you think of me, iTunes?"
Chi-Lites - Ohhh Girl - So, what you're saying iTunes is I'm okay in your book and female.. that's good to know. Good to know that you'd be in trouble if I left you now.

"Will I have a happy life?"
Bad Company - Feel Like Making Love - You don't know me at all iTunes! And after all we've been through!

"What do my friends really think of me?"
Incubus - Nice to Know You - Aww, you guys. It's nice to know you too. It looks like all those gifts to keep me on your good side appear to be working.

"Do people secretly lust after me?"
INXS - Elegantly Wasted - Elegantly Wasted people lust after me. That sounds about right. Have you been spying on me at the bar again, iTunes?

"How can I make myself happy?"
Jasom Mraz - The Remedy (I Won't Worry) - Good tip. I won't worry my life away. I will, however, pout and bitch.

"What should I do with my life?"
George Benson - On Broadway - Once I get over that whole afraid to speak in front of large crowds and not being able to speak without mumbling incoherently, I'll get right on that.

"Why must life be so full of pain?"
Rage Against The Machine - Bulls on Parade - Exactly the explanation I came up with in my tenth grade journal.

"How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?"
DMX - Ruff Ryders Anthem - Uhm, iTunes, I thought we weren't going to mention that. The bonds of trust have been broken.

"Will I ever have children?"
The Smashing Pumpkins - Here is No Why - ... but I want kids, iTunes. This relationship is on shaky ground.

"Will I die happy?"
Stone Temple Pilots - Sour Girl - if I don't have kids, I will be.

"Can you give me some advice?"
Blink 182 - All the Small Things - It is the small things. Thanks for putting it in perspective.

"What do you think happiness is?"
Sheryl Crow - If It Makes You Happy - Awww...maybe this relationship will work out after all, iTunes.

"What's my favorite fetish?"
Nat King Cole - When I Fall In Love - It is and thanks for not mentioning that other thing.. iTunes.

Maybe I just don't get it. I don't live in Los Angeles and probably never will. I freely admit that, but I thought Crash was rather underwhelming and spectacularly unimpressive film. Every frame felt like an attempt to make an important film about racism and prejudice. Every frame felt like it was giving itself a congratulatory pat on the back for exposing the ugly truth that lives inside our hearts. We judge people. We do. Nothing about the film felt organic and worst of all, nothing felt truthful at all. I am quite surprised this film, a few steps up from a Lifetime TV movie starring Tracey Gold and Grant Show, won the Best Picture Oscar. The film lost me at in its opening moments when it, literally, opens with a car crash. Yes, we get it. People crash into each other. Live intersect in unexpected ways. Crash. GET IT. The film almost tipped over into parody for me when it literally ended with another car crash. Crash. GET IT. Why can't be all just get along, yo! I admire the film for its lofty ambitions, but I feel it just came up short on all fronts. For my money, Spike Lee's Do the Right Thing accomplished what Crash was aiming for, but unlike Crash it does not take the easy, dramatic rode. When Do the Right Thing is over nothing is resolved, nothing is tied up in a neat little bow, in fact, no one learns any lessons about prejudice or race and things are even more fucked up than they were at the beginning of the film. In my opinion, that is a lot more truthful, a lot more honest.

posted by runnerbird | 9:27 PM